Here’s a look at a handful of the most memorable (and traumatic) crushes, chomps, meltings and flattenings in motion picture history, ranked in order of awesomeness!
5) Tyrannosaurus Rex, FTW! (Jurassic Park)
The true hero of Jurassic Park, T-Rex! The big, green dude saves the day, time after time! First, he CHOMPS down on the evil corporate lackey, attorney Donald Gennaro:
[sz-youtube url=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VMzfrod7hcE” /]
Then, he swoops in and saves everyone from a terrible disembowelment from those pesky velociraptors. There’s a damn good reason my man T-Rex is the “Tyrant Lizard!”
4) Emil Antonowsky takes a bath (Robocop)
Paul Verhoeven’s soul bears the weight of all the young minds he warped when he put this MELTING scene on celluloid. And now, with digital technology, future generations will also get to experience this complete and utter annihilation of a human body.
**WARNING: Do NOT watch while eating or if you are going to eat anytime within the next 72 hours. Thank you.**
Prepare to witness cellular disintegration:
[sz-youtube url=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FftEeQmuDWM” /]
I know, I know. It’ll be okay.
3) Judge Doom goes on the steamroller diet (Who Framed Roger Rabbit?)
This is a Disney movie, which makes this scene all the more deliciously fucked up. First, you have to watch Doc Brown get slowly FLATTENED by a steamroller, and then, he becomes one of the most terrifying villains ever. And then, he fucking MELTS! Two awesome, trauma-inducing death scenes for the price of one!
2) Sarah Connor crushes the T-800 with irony (The Terminator)
Throughout the whole movie, this machine, this technological terror, is chasing her, unstoppable, unreasoning. And how does she finally defeat it? With another machine. Fuckin’ A! I commend James Cameron for his ironic ending, as well as his warning to beware of giving such power to technology. Plus: it’s really cool to see hot chicks CRUSH robots.
1) Godzilla.
C’mon. What are we even talking about here? It’s Godzilla.
What’s your favorite movie crush?
