What K-9 and Muffit II Have Been Up to All This Time

Isn’t it peculiar that the awesome robotic dogs from the original Doctor Who and Battlestar Galactica shows were cut from both of the “new-and-improved” series?  Sure, both of their tin-foil-lifeless-eyes types of physical appearance are vastly outdated, but both BSG and Doctor Who managed to refit their humanoid robo-antagonists successfully, so why did the metallic doggie buddies get left out in the cold?

We did some research and found out why that is; it’s a regular cosmic canine conspiracy!

Here is a bit of background for those of you who don’t frequently watch mid-to-late twentieth century sci-fi.  In the original Battlestar series, Muffit II was a robot dog built in the likeness of a daggit (alien dog).  Since the Cylons killed all the Snoopies, Spots, and Fluffies on Caprica, a doctor on Galactica invented Muffit II, in the likeness of one the adorable, dead daggits.  To be specific, Muffit II was based on Muffit [the First], a beloved pet of a boy named Boxey.

As for K-9, various incarnations of the robot-dog helped out several of the original Doctors as far back as 1977.  However, K-9 has only made one recent appearance in an episode called “School Reunion” which aired in 2006.  In the meantime, he was co-opted by The Sarah Jane Chronicles and a few other weird British programs.

Well, it turns out, friends and conspiracy theorists, K-9 and Muffit II have been in collusion, plotting a robot dog apocalypse, to avenge their small-screen neglect.  Here are the top three ways they’ve been filling their calendars and doggie bowls.

One: Grooming

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While most pooches visit the local pet salon for their grooming needs, K-9 and Muffit traveled to the Kennedy Space Center in Cape Canaveral, Florida to get spruced up.  While regular pups enjoy a nice flea-shampoo bath while getting their nails clipped, K-9 and Muffit II treated themselves to a high-intensity skin conditioning treatment which involved the soothing soldering of super-strong 5Cr-Mo-V aircraft steel to their exoskeletons.  Now they’re fresh smelling, spiffy looking, and indestructible.

Two: Fitness

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Shepherding a robo-apocalpyse requires stamina and focus.  Muffit II and K-9 spent several weeks on a dog agility course in East Anglia where K-9 shares a country home with actress Elisabeth Sladen.  While Muffit II had some difficulty with the tunnels and jumps, K-9 fared well, merely lasering all the obstacles out of his way.  Cesar Millan was invited to the retreat for tactical discussions, as he will be the liaison to the human race once K-9 and Muffit II launch their attack.

Three: Snausages and Flash Drives

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A hearty meal is terribly important before battle.  K-9 and Muffit have been on a strict diet of four gig USB drives and beef and cheese flavored Snausages.  The occasional plutonium-laced Greenie is allowed as well.  No Chuck Wagon for these furry friends.

So, while we watch DVDs of Battlestar and eagerly anticipate the return of the Eleventh Doctor, the scorned robo-dogs are plotting their comeback, world-take-over-style.  What will the rebooted version of Earth look like?  Will vacuum cleaners be eradicated?  Will Muffit II and K-9 be the creative forces behind Battlestar Galactica and Doctor Who movies?  Only time will tell.  In the meantime, give your dog an extra treat and keep an eye on the toaster. 

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About the author

Kristen Bobst is a grade-A comedy writer, an unstoppable sock puppeteer, and the world's foremost whimsy aficionado. She certainly believes the meaning of life really is 42; and right now Kristen is really into The Carrie Diaries. Comediva. Where the funny girls are.

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1 comment

  1. Micah Smith

    K-9 was used in the Sarah Jane Adventures on the BBC (a kids spin-off of Dr. Who) for a few episodes but was limited because of a contract for the character to headline his own kids program. It was an Australian/British collaboration (and was horrible).

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