Web Creeper of the Week: Sperm Warfare

Sperm Warfare

PseudoPimp:  I came across your profile and was wondering if you would accept an engagement of witty banter between two intellectuals. Of course
this “engagement” may start off as purely platonic but my sensual desires will most likely guide our cohesive unity down more erotic, lascivious, and sexual paths that will include but are not limited to rump pounding, sperm warfare, sexual acts involving food, and an abundance of new unchartered sexual positions where I assert my pure dominance in establishing a realm of absolute sovereignty in your nether regions.

MissAnthropic:  I cannot believe you actually just wrote that to me. Please take your “sperm warfare” elsewhere. I’m not interested in random sexual relations with some pseudo-intellectual pervert who’s handy with a thesaurus.

PseudoPimp:  Ok, slut.

MissAnthropic:  I believe I am the antithesis of a “slut” seeing as how I just rejected your offer.

PseudoPimp:  You shouldn’t respond to messages like my previous one, “dumb woman.”

MissAnthropic:  I am confused as to why you felt compelled to use quotation marks around your attempted insult.  I am way too narcissistic to be offended by that.  Have a horrible day, douche bag.

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