The Fast Food Standard: Chart House vs. Long John Silver’s

Welcome to The Fast Food Standard’s seafood battle!  Fancy fishes versus the undersea proletariat.  Do all fish fry equal?  I decided to find out.

I visited Chart House for a Saturday lunch and Long John Silver’s the next day for dinner.

Locale & Atmosphere:

The Marina del Rey Chart House is located deep in Los Angeles’ only harbor, right next to the docks.  From my table, I could see the water happily lapping against sporty little yachts and ocean-worthy vessels with equal abandon.  Knowing that the friends and family of the menu’s selection were merrily cavorting in the water just beyond the picture window, unaware that they might be next on somebody’s plate, reinforced an almost irresistible urge to call, “Here, fishy fishy.”

A journey into the heart of L.A. County’s Gardena leads you to the fast food fish hotspot known as Long John Silver’s.  A wide-open parking lot welcomed me.  No pesky valets buzzing around.  No pretentiousness present!  Seating?  No problem.  As the sole diner, I could sit at the booth of my choice.  The view at Long John Silver’s was of … a Kentucky Fried Chicken.  Yes, indeedy, this eatery is in a fast food Mecca.  The Colonel himself, mint julep in hand, bore witness to this Fast Food Standard battle.

The Food:

At Long John Silver’s, or “The LJS”, as the local privateers call it, I ordered a variety platter consisting of two fried halibut strips, a few butterflied shrimp, twin hushpuppies, fries, and tucked into a corner of the box, a tiny cup of coleslaw.  Enough food to feed me and my imaginary catamaran full of sexy, peckish seamen.  The salty shrimp were so-so soggy, the halibut was unremarkable, but the coleslaw was a crunchy delight!

At Chart House, I ordered coconut shrimp and my date had fish ‘n chips.  The crispy shrimp were delectable; their coconut-y texture accented buttery white insides.  The fish, resting on a bed o’ chips, was tenderly tasty.

The matter of sides — Any land-lubbing food-lubber knows that french fries reside in the wheelhouse of fast food dining.  But … Long John Silver’s fries were only marginally tastier than Chart House “chips.”  However, Long John Silver’s hushpuppies were without a doubt the highlight of this seafood challenge.  Chart House should be ashamed for failing to mention hushpuppies on their menu.  To get my doughy fix, I’d sail back to Gardena through any squall or traffic jam just to net those hushpuppies.

The Verdict:

While this was a close, tight, nail-biting Fast Food Standard battle, Chart House wins by a scale off a mermaid’s tail!  Atmosphere and superior shrimpies prevail!  Sorry, Mr. Long John, Captain, Sir, but a woman cannot live on hushpuppies alone.

Did you like this edition of Fast Food Standard?  Check out the previous battle between Sbarro and Spago here.

****