Quiz: Romulan Arm-Wrestling Match

Take this quiz and find out how long you’d hold up in an arm-wrestling match with a Romulan!

Glohhaasi’ mnekha!

romulan
How do you feel about Vulcans?
a) Lava is pretty.
b) Why would I have any opinion about the Roman fire god?
c) Spock’s my favorite!
d) Die, Vulcans, die!

What’s your take on breaking treaties?
a) I never break a promise!  Ever!
b) I’m all about world peace, dudettes.
c) All’s fair in love and war.
d) Show me a truce and I’ll show you hwi kre-dhei ways to break it.

Have you ever been to a strip club?
a) No.
b) No, but I’d like to see what it’s like.
c) So what if my stripper name used to be “Seven of Sixty-Nine?”
d) Let’s fire up the Warbird and hit up a strip club right now.  I have a Groupon for two-for-one lap dances at Buxom Betazoids.

How do you feel about Cardassians?
a) I love Keeping up with the Kardashians!
b) Kim Cardassian would actually be a really scary alien.
c) I hear Cardassia Prime is lovely in the winter.
d) Subjugating Cardassians is my favorite weekend activity.

What’s your favorite food?
a) Organic lentil soup in a gluten-free bread bowl.
b) Deep-dish pizza.
c) Strong ale.
d) Oddly enough … gummy bears.  But only when I pretend the gummy bears are little tiny multi-colored Vulcans.  I dip the gummy-Vulcans in home-brewed Kali-fal and then bite off their soggy, booze-soaked heads.  Die, Gummy-Spock, die!

Rakal_Major
If you answered:

Mostly “A”: Less than a minute.  Yikes.

Mostly “B”: You’d last two and a half minutes.  Keep practicing.

Mostly “C”: You’d hold up for an hour!  Nice going!

Mostly “D”: Hey, hey!  You are a Romulan!  Time to start a war! 

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About the author

Kristen Bobst is a grade-A comedy writer, an unstoppable sock puppeteer, and the world's foremost whimsy aficionado. She certainly believes the meaning of life really is 42; and right now Kristen is really into The Carrie Diaries. Comediva. Where the funny girls are.

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