The television theme song is a lost art. In days gone by, a show’s theme song told you everything you needed to know before you sat down to watch. In thirty seconds, you’d get a catchy little ditty and a rundown of the show’s plot, major characters and setting. These days, those thirty seconds equal desperately needed ad dollars, so buh-bye theme songs.
However, as the broadcast television model dies a slow, lingering death and streaming digital takes over, we get to make all new rules! Mayhaps the TV theme song is poised for a major comeback? If so, what would the themes to some of our favorite shows sound like?
Community
Sung to the tune of “The Ballad of Gilligan’s Island” from Gilligan’s Island
Just sit right back and you’ll hear a tale,
A tale of a motley crew.
Students suddenly realizing,
They didn’t have a clue.
Jeff was a former lawyer man,
Britta, righteous and hot.
Seven students gather in a study group,
So Jeff could get laid, Jeff could get laid.
The classes started getting rough,
Señor Chang went nuts,
If Jeff didn’t pass the tests,
His law career would be lost, law career would be lost.
So the gang meets up in Group Study Room F
With Jeff Winger
And Britta too,
The millionaire and his ego,
Troy and Abed,
And the rest,
Here at Greendale!
The Walking Dead
Sung to the tune of “The Ballad of Jed Clampett” from The Beverly Hillbillies
Come and listen to a story about a man named Rick
Sheriff’s deputy, got shot by some hick,
Left behind when the dead started to rise,
While his buddy Shane tried to fertilize.
Rick’s wife, that is, Lori Grimes, Carl’s mom.
Well the next thing you know ol’ Rick wakes up,
Kills some zombies while Lori and Shane schtup.
With his wife is the place he’d rather be,
So he loads up a horse and heads to the city.
Atlanta, that is. To meet Glenn, and Andrea!
Well now its time to say goodbye to Rick and all his kin.
Hershel and Maggie would like to thank you fer kindly droppin’ in.
Daryl don’t like you, and T-Dog barely speaks,
But Carol will be sure to kiss you on the cheek.
Just don’t spook ’em that is. ‘Cuz they’ll shoot you.
Y’all come back now, y’hear?
Modern Family
Sung to the tune of “The Brady Bunch Theme” from The Brady Bunch
Here’s the story, of Jay Pritchett,
Who divorced after bringing up two very lovely kids.
Claire had hair of gold, like her mother,
And Mitchell was gay.
Here’s the story, of a man named Dunphy,
A cheerleader who fell in love with Claire,
They had three kids, living all together,
Yet they were all alone.
Till the one day when Jay Pritchett met a señorita
She moved in with her rotund son,
Then Mitchell and his partner adopted Lily.
That’s the way we all became a Modern Family.
Modern Family,
That’s the way we all became a Modern Family.
Modern Family.
However, as the broadcast television model dies a slow, lingering death and streaming digital takes over, we get to make all new rules! Mayhaps the TV theme song is poised for a major comeback? If so, what would the themes to some of our favorite shows sound like?
Community
Sung to the tune of “The Ballad of Gilligan’s Island” from Gilligan’s Island
A tale of a motley crew.
Students suddenly realizing,
They didn’t have a clue.
Jeff was a former lawyer man,
Britta, righteous and hot.
Seven students gather in a study group,
So Jeff could get laid, Jeff could get laid.
The classes started getting rough,
Señor Chang went nuts,
If Jeff didn’t pass the tests,
His law career would be lost, law career would be lost.
So the gang meets up in Group Study Room F
With Jeff Winger
And Britta too,
The millionaire and his ego,
Troy and Abed,
And the rest,
Here at Greendale!
Sung to the tune of “The Ballad of Jed Clampett” from The Beverly Hillbillies
Sheriff’s deputy, got shot by some hick,
Left behind when the dead started to rise,
While his buddy Shane tried to fertilize.
Rick’s wife, that is, Lori Grimes, Carl’s mom.
Well the next thing you know ol’ Rick wakes up,
Kills some zombies while Lori and Shane schtup.
With his wife is the place he’d rather be,
So he loads up a horse and heads to the city.
Atlanta, that is. To meet Glenn, and Andrea!
Well now its time to say goodbye to Rick and all his kin.
Hershel and Maggie would like to thank you fer kindly droppin’ in.
Daryl don’t like you, and T-Dog barely speaks,
But Carol will be sure to kiss you on the cheek.
Just don’t spook ’em that is. ‘Cuz they’ll shoot you.
Y’all come back now, y’hear?
Modern Family
Sung to the tune of “The Brady Bunch Theme” from The Brady Bunch
Who divorced after bringing up two very lovely kids.
Claire had hair of gold, like her mother,
And Mitchell was gay.
Here’s the story, of a man named Dunphy,
A cheerleader who fell in love with Claire,
They had three kids, living all together,
Yet they were all alone.
Till the one day when Jay Pritchett met a señorita
She moved in with her rotund son,
Then Mitchell and his partner adopted Lily.
That’s the way we all became a Modern Family.
Modern Family,
That’s the way we all became a Modern Family.
Modern Family.
