As American soap operas get cancelled left and right, Mexican soap operas are only gaining momentum. There’s even a new influx of Mexican soap opera production going on right here in the U.S.
It’s clear that Mexican soap operas are the next big thing.
As always, to help you cash in on this new trend, we’ve got some tips on how you can create your very own Mexican soap opera.
Here they are:
1. Have a lot of weddings–and we do mean A LOT of weddings.
[sz-youtube url=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sgPgNxbJXUo” /]
2. Have a poor girl fall in love with a rich guy whose rich parents don’t want him to marry down.
3. Have a lot of wide-eyed “dramatic staring” scenes in which a man suddenly enters a room and the woman stares back at him in shock. Then, the woman turns towards the camera, deep in thought, while the man stands behind her, and then the woman slowly turns around, and her eyes meet with his eyes, until they almost… maybe… oooh so close! Tune in next time.
[sz-youtube url=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QDaXbzSh09c” /]
4. Feature the Mexican version of Brad Pitt, William Levy, who you gotta admit, is somehow twice as hot as the American Brad Pitt.
[sz-youtube url=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kFuhgB_ZhIg” /]
5. Feature a lot of very loooong, passionate, sloppy kissing.
6. Have long, steamy love scenes which are clearly soft core porn intended for the ladies.
7. If you’re deciding on a title for your Mexican soap opera, make sure the title includes a Spanish word that means “love,” heart,” “romance,” “passion,” or a random combination of two or more of these, like “Corazon Con Pasion En Una Tortilla De Amor.”
8. If you think the drama in your Mexican soap opera is so over the top that it might be perceived as ridiculous—then the drama in your Mexican soap opera is not over-the-top enough.
[sz-youtube url=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bb5RNjnUZW8″ /]
9. Feature people having inner monologues with a lot of fancy “raised-eyebrow choreography.”
10. Two words: CAT FIGHTS!
[sz-youtube url=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VDnqXW0lADU” /]
11. Feature dramatic background orchestration that was apparently composed by a satanic cult from the early 90s.
12. Make sure the women have tons of wildly entertaining nervous breakdowns.
[sz-youtube url=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTnpR3VT0kw” /]
13. Make sure the promos are so overloaded with drama that old Mexican grandmas are sure to get post-traumatic stress disorder just by watching them.
14. Make sure the guy who does the voice overs for those promos has a voice deeper than James Earl Jones with a really bad cold.
[sz-youtube url=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U3caYFkX4TU” /]
15. Please note: your Mexican soap opera is not complete without a love scene between two nearly naked lovers in an exotic-looking lake.
[sz-youtube url=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vNmvpPxgJaE” /]
16. It is absolutely mandatory that someone end up in a hospital as quickly as humanely possible.
17. Make sure the women in your Mexican soap opera are shedding endless amounts of tears most of the time.
18. Feature a lot of praying to the Virgin Mary. (If you have the Virgin Mary actually appear to one of the characters, then you get bonus points!)
19. Finally, when in doubt: just have another wedding!
[sz-youtube url=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z0jSLQkkCcs” /]
