Boycott:
Source: trevorhale.com
Disneylandia and anything characteristic of a Disneyland parque, including:
– Overpriced churros
– Gay hombres wearing flamboyant ropa who sing and dance in a parade that surprisingly is not associated with National Gay Pride Month.
– Lying about your cumpleaños just to get free tortillas at the Disney California Adventure Tortilla Factory.
– Inviting your disabled primo just so you can cut to the front of the line every time.
– Saying that your 7-year-old hija is really 2 years old just so you don’t have to pay for her ticket to get in.
– Bad tans, sore piernas, fanny packs, mom jeans, lanyards, visors, and stupid hats you wouldn’t be caught dead wearing afuera del parque.
– Thinking that comprando glow stick necklaces are a great investment if you just stick them in a refrigerator despues de que los usas.
2. The Transportation Security Administration (TSA)
Why:
Okay, don’t get me wrong: odio a las terroristas. But we can’t protect esta pais from every terrorist threat.
Se me hace que the TSA doesn’t get this because now they’re warning that terrorists might consider implanting bombs under their skin.
Gente, before the TSA starts to go from “full-body scans” to “full-body cavity searches,” tenemos que parar esto before it goes too far!
Boycott:
Source: Los Angeles Times
Any intrusive airport seguridad practices that might be introduced, like:
– Providing a urine sample before comprando tu ticket.
– Going through waterboarding-style tortura before ordering your Starbucks café at the airport lounge.
– Being required to present home videos from your niñez — proving you weren’t brainwashed to join an extremist grupo musulmana, but spent most of your tiempo picking your own boogers.
3. Sex
Why:
Recently, 300 mujeres in Colombia decided to withhold sexo from their esposos until they pressured the government to get a broken road repaired.
Hermanas, this is brilliant!
Source: mydaily.com
Los republicanos have stopped Obama from making a high-speed rail system in the U.S. a realidad, but now we can help speed up this process! All we have to do is band together and withhold sexo from our novios until they pressure the gobierno to approve funding for a high-speed rail system!
Boycott:
– Banging
– Bumping
– Grinding
– Getting it on
– Inserting his “pollo” into your “pot of mole”
– Doing “La Danza Azteca”
– Jumping the “fence” and crossing “La Frontera” into Arizona
– Parking his “carro” at the local “swapmeet”
– Putting his “chile relleno” en tu “flour tortilla”
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