Bill Nye and Beakman Pass the Gauntlet

After a wild night of binge-drinking and stuffing Jeffersons into silky stripper thongs, Bill Nye and Beakman started reminiscing about the golden age of science shows for kids on TV. The comically oversized lab props, the neon zig-zag segment transitions, and stock kid extras of different ethnicities. It was a great time for television. They wondered what it would take for someone to become the next great children’s edutainment host…

Here are some of their hypotheses:

Gordon Ramsay

NYEMAN_ramsay2
His ability to make grown men and women cry might translate all too well.

Sheldon Cooper

NYEMAN_cooper2
He might not be able to take it down a notch…

Tim Gunn

NYEMAN_gunn2 
He works in the fashion industry, which means he has a special degree in making everyone in the vicinity feel wildly insecure.

Heidi Klum

NYEMAN_klum2 
D for Distracting. Also, if you fail to live up to Project Science Lab’s standards, you ah out.

Aubrey Plaza

NYEMAN_plaza2
One word: #awkward. Second/Third word: mildly frightening.
 
Who, then, will rise to the challenge? Who has a geek following big and eager enough to keep audiences watching? Whose charm and peppiness can trick kids into learning?

Eureka!

NYEMAN_brie
It’s gotta be none other than Alison Brie! 

Share This

About the author

A native of Jacksonville, Florida, Kristen Bobst grew up a tomboy with two brothers, several unruly pets, and an overactive imagination. After surviving four years of Gossip Girl-style antics at a ritzy private high school, Kristen went on to the University of Florida (Go Gators!). Due to an uncanny Oscar Wilde obsession, she then traveled to Dublin to study Anglo-Irish Literature at Trinity College. While overseas, she spent much time staying in seedy hostels and carousing with the locals. To this day, Kristen cannot convert Fahrenheit to Celsius without the use of a scientific calculator. Kristen recently completed the University of Southern California’s MFA program in Screenwriting. She still has an overactive imagination and several unruly pets. Comediva writer and performer Vickie Toro graduated from USC with degrees in I Don’t Know How to Do Practical Things Like Math and Maybe I Should’ve Listened to My Mother (i.e. Cinema-Television Critical Studies and Narrative Studies). She spends her time thinking about deep things, getting distracted by not-deep things, and then gigglesnorting. Comediva. Where the funny girls are.

View all articles by Kristen Bobst and Vickie Toro

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *