Giggle Goddess: Sofiya Alexandra

Welcome to our Giggle Goddess question and answer session! This time we sat down with the imcomparably hilarious Sofiya Alexandra, who is making comedic waves on both the Internet and the standup stage! Connect with Sofiya on Twitter, tumblr, Facebook, Swampoon, and onesheet!

What’s your favorite cupcake flavor?

Innocence.

What or whom inspired you to pursue a career in comedy?

A lot of inspirations along the way, but I fell in love with comedy as a six-year-old kid in the Ukraine while watching Russian masters like Mikhail Zhvanetsky and Klara Novikova. These people mean nothing to Americans, but are gods to Russians. Just so sharp, such amazing character work and commentary on the political and social climate of the time, and so fucking funny. I remember trying to stay up really late on New Year’s Eve when all the comedians would perform their best sets on TV and being so mad at never quite making it all the way through because I’d fall asleep. I didn’t consciously decide that was what I would do with my life until much later, but I do know that was the most impressed I had ever been by anything at that point in my life. Oh, except for firemen, I was super-into firemen.

If Chuck Norris were to corner you in an alley and challenge you to a duel, what would be your weapon of choice?

The woman’s right to choose and welfare – I think he’s a rightwing nutter, no?

What are some challenges you’ve faced since going down the comedy track and what, in your experience, has made those obstacles worth overcoming?

Ugh. Myself, mostly. Depression, anxiety, fear. Being afraid to commit to such an uncertain and difficult career path. There’s nothing grave that has prevented me from doing my best all the time. I mean, being poor doesn’t help, and having day jobs while trying to go hard at comedy is hard, but it’s not impossible. A wonderful young comic I was lucky to get to know, Will Ard, passed away recently due to health issues. The kid had elephantitis of the hands, and was in constant pain while on heavy medication, and hit up more open mikes than most comics. If he could hustle, and be hysterical, and kind, and inspire all his friends regularly, and I bitch about “obstacles,” it seems kind of ridiculous. If you want it enough, more than anything else in the world, you will make it happen. What makes it all worthwhile for comedians is obviously the laughs, the laughs I need to throw down that bottomless dark pit in my heart that’s yearning for love and a piggyback ride from my father.

What’s the funniest thing you’ve ever heard/seen?

Wow, what a difficult question, there are so many great things out there. I mean, if you really twist my arm to choose one, I guess I would have to say this interview. Man, no matter how many times I read over my answers, I STILL LAUGH OUT LOUD. Who is this girl, America?! WHO IS SHE AND WHY IS SHE NOT ON OUR TELEVISIONS

Which comedienne, dead or alive, would you love to work with/meet?

I want to lie really still on top of Tina Fey while Amy Poehler lies on top of me. I don’t want us to talk or work together, but if someone decided to kiss me a little bit, I’d like it.

In what ways do you think you’ve improved or evolved since your first comedy venture?

I shudder at anything I wrote or performed if it’s been longer than six months since. It’s the nature of the beast. The more you work, evolve, learn, the more displeased you are with earlier work. The most important thing is never being afraid to make stuff, to create things that make you happy. Fear wastes a lot of time, and if I’ve gotten better at anything comedy-wise, or life-wise, it’s been because I’ve worked at it despite how horribly I may have felt about my first efforts.

What long-term/short-term goals do you have for your career?

1. Move in with Ice and Coco.
2. Start a clothing line with Coco, call it Entrepreneur, but all the e’s are nipples and the p is a butt.
3. Take money from Entrepreneur, buy friends.
4. Buy Ice and Coco the best most thoughtful gift of their entire lives.
5. Kick God in the face.
6. Never die.

Do you have a specific audience to whom you play/would like to play? Describe that audience, and why/how you’re playing to them.

Although I hope everyone likes my comedy, I’m particularly invested in griffins. Out of all the mythological creatures, they seem to be the most stern. LIGHTEN UP GRIFFINS YOU’VE GOT THE BODIES OF LIONS LAUGH A LITTLE BROS

When you’re not writing/performing comedy, you’re…

I have a garden. Shut up, I know. I like digging around in the dirt and pollinating plants with a paintbrush. I also spend a lot of time with my kittens, Benson and Stabler. It’s one thing when cats bring home a dead bird to honor you, it’s quite another when it’s the body of a dead woman. It’s like, uh, thanks, I guess? BUT DID YOU EVEN TELL THE CAPTAIN OR CHECK FOR DNA UNDER HER FINGERNAILS?! Kittens are so much trouble and so bad at police procedures, you guys!!

[sz-youtube url=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C0h_QpamY2Y” /]

What’s the difference between appealing to women and appealing to men?

I read somewhere that men like tits, but I’m uncertain. I DO know that women love purses and shoes, hold on a second, my purse is stuck in my shoes and my shoes have their period!! I think funny is funny, regardless of gender. A sense of humor is unique, like a fingerprint, and you have no control over who loves your jokes, so trying to appeal to a certain group is futile. I never think about making a particular segment of people laugh, unless it’s Asians, they work too hard.

What’s your favorite comedy movie or T.V. show of all time?

Louie is my favorite comedy show of all time. It’s unflinchingly funny and honest. When I watch it live, I feel like the people who watched the moon landing on TV – this is groundbreaking, history-making television. The fact that a show can make me laugh and cry and cringe and ponder the universe in the same half-hour is nothing short of extraordinary. That show should be mandatory viewing.

The title of your autobiography?

The Audacity of Hope.

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And an excerpt from that biography:

Sofiya Alexandra is a writer, comedian, and America’s favorite lasagna! Sofiya grew up in Odessa, Ukraine, and moved to Los Angeles at the awkward age of 11, making a ton of great friends right away and having a blast adjusting! Just kidding. She can be seen performing stand-up all over LA, and in 140 characters on Twitter. Her tweets have appeared on Splitsider and Huffington Post. She’s a Witstream contributor, an improviser, and an actor in the web series So Natural (feautured on Comediva, failblog, front page of Funny or Die, 247comedy and The Blush). She’s a co-producer of a monthly mystery-lineup comedy show called SURPRISE!, and a stand-up show called Gonzo, and a new one called Literassy, featuring comedic readings of everything from song lyrics to your diary. She’s probably thinking about you right now.