Mad Men Meets Harry Potter

With the new season of Mad Men up and running, many a fan is starting to wonder where each character is headed.  And what better way to really get to the heart of the possibilities than to compare it to another intricately laid-out and beloved series, Harry Potter?

So, here to help us work out the kinks of our favorite and least favorite MM characters are the more familiar cast of HP.

Pete Campbell – Draco Malfoy

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Ambitious to a fault, with a very subtle yet genuine kindness within, Pete only hesitates on his path to power when a loved one is in need, just like everyone’s favorite bleach-haired bully did atop the Astronomy Tower in Book 6. Moreover, both have severe daddy issues that drive them to succeed. And neither likes sharing. So my theory? Pete’s going to learn, the hard way, exactly how much family means to him; and he’s going to learn to balance his ambition and need to save face with his true self. And might end up with a receding hairline by his late 30s.

Harry Crane – Neville Longbottom

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Poor Harry. Always overlooked, always underestimated; not to mention the clear weight-loss and sudden Kind of Attractive change he kicked off the show’s fifth season with. Will he, too, surprise us all by decapitating a snake?

Roger Sterling – Ron Weasley

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Charming, and, at first glance, a little dim-witted and lazy, Roger and Ron have quite a lot in common. Though Roger’s a great deal less lovable than Ron, there’s no denying the fact that they share a short-temper, stubborness (especially when they decide they strongly (and, sometimes, blindly) dislike someone), and a special tie to red-heads. Roger may not be the brightest bulb at SCDP, but he does bring a certain level of comic relief, as well as the ability to stir the pot.

Joan Harris – Hermione Granger

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Everyone relies on Joan, just as nobody in the Harry Potter series could’ve survived without Hermione. Joan has a somewhat tragic story of her own, but she’s determined and focused on the task at hand, and keeps her bitches in check.  Self-sacrifice seems to be her lot in life, just as Hermione often puts her own needs ahead of her own.  Also, both women here kick ass.  In a major way.

Betty Francis – Severus Snape

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That’s right, I said it: just as Snape was so hated in the first five or so books, and managed to redeem himself in a HUGE way by the end of the series, so Betty will rise up and surpass all expectations. Because even though, at the moment, she comes off as a totally insane and selfish ho-box, various moments of BAMFness (ie shooting at her douchey neighbor’s pigeons in her kids’ defense, vomiting in Don’s beloved new car, divorcing her adulterous husband in a time when doing so was frowned upon) were littered all throughout previous seasons, just as Snape’s so-called evil actions were revealed to be part of a bigger and actually selfless plan. So, mark my words, there’s hope for Betty. And I’d totally get a “Betty is Good” bookmark reminiscent to the Snape ones that were handed out just before Deathly Hallows‘ release.

Bert Cooper – Albus Dumbledore

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Eccentric, crazy old, and really only on screen when some bit of random wisdom needs to be shared, Cooper and Dumbledore could be best friends.

Don Draper – Tom Riddle

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Shocked? Don’t be: after much nerdgasming and thinking, pre-Voldemort and pre-Don have quite a bit in common. The double-name thing, for example, as both try to hide their more humble roots. And anyone who knows of their past lives is immediately suspect and cast off, except for a Bellatrix Lestrange (or, in Mad Men, Megan Draper. Zou bisou bisou!). Both characters’ upbringings also brought on whole hosts of irrational fears and completely self-involved behaviors: the collection and eventual disregard/disposal of overly devoted admirers; the mystery of their true identities; the fear of death. Because, even though both are at the top of their fields, there’s always the chance one little hitch might very well kill the identity they created for themselves and that got them to where they are. I’m not saying Don’s the epitome of evil — no matter how much of a d-bag he never fails to be — but just as Tom, with all his charisma and talent, could have gone down a much higher road, so Don has to grapple with his own past and gifts and decide which side of the ethics line he’s on.

Peggy Olson – Harry Potter

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A troubled past, coupled with the need to do the right thing, with the occasional emotional outburst, Peggy bears all the same marks of a hero as our Harry. Moreover, as she has similar ambitions as Don, but a higher ethical code and the earnestness to always see the good in people, she’s very much the creative director’s foil. Remember, Don once told Peggy she reminds him of himself, as Voldemort often told Harry, but being that Don’s a total twat-biscuit and Peggy’s a goodhearted BAMF, I sincerely hope Peggy wins out in the end. 

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About the author

Hi, friend! I'm Vickie Toro. I'm the lesbian in Lesbros, the creator and one of the writers of BAMF Girls Club, and the Frumpy Girl who commiserates with your Style Ineptness. I'm a Potterhead, water-dancer, and overall TV junky. Also sports movies make me cry.

View all articles by Vickie Toro

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