1. Rainbow-colored lightsabers.
2. Yoda’s sprightly green grandchildren.
3. A choreographed danced number breaks out at the Mos Eisley Cantina.
4. More hair buns and forward-thinking alien hair fashions.
5. Han and Leia’s snarktastic bebes.
6. 3 or 4 new kinds of Chewbacca howls.
7. Emotional arcs that develop organically from the characters and are not shoe-horned into a special effects driven storyline. Or, more lightsaber fights.
8. A romance between robots!
9. Samuel L. Jackson’s ghost cameo as Mace Windu (stranger things have happened!).
10 A dream (nightmare?) sequence showing what would have happened if Luke and Leia hadn’t found out they were siblings until too late. Far too late.
11. The Star Wars Holiday Special somewhere.
12. C3PO’s offspring.
13. A Boba Fett back story back story, featuring a sassy, gun slinging bounty hunter named Jenga Fett (who falls over anytime you remove a block from her).
14. Sassy Yaddle as voiced by Betty White.
15. Leia discovers her hidden Jedi power.
16. Han Solo’s kid breaks the Kessel Run record.
17. Leia busts out her old gold bikini and, yes, she’s still got it.
18. The ghost of Jabba the Hutt causes ruckuses all over the place.
19. Ewoks eat the entirety of Jar Jar Binks’ people.
20. The Sarlacc gets a themesong.
21. The Clone soldiers start to have existential crises.
22. Admiral Akbar comes up with a new catchphrase.
