Web Creeper of the Week: Tearjerker

I have heard about and experienced firsthand the nightmare that is internet dating. It seems the internet is a breeding ground for perverts, douche bags, and mental pygmies. I would be remiss if I did not share these experiences with all of you Comedivas. Yes, these are real conversations.

Tearjerker

creeper_tearjerkerBigDong88:
hey

MissAnthropic: Oh … great. This ought to be good.

BigDong88: how are u. ur pretty

MissAnthropic: I’m great. Thanks.

BigDong88: what u doing

BigDong88: i love ur eyes

MissAnthropic: I am working from home, and thank you. Flattery will get you everywhere.

BigDong88: how so

MissAnthropic: It’s just a saying that means I like compliments.

BigDong88: np

BigDong88: i love ur lips

MissAnthropic: Thanks again.

BigDong88: what are u doing after ur done working

MissAnthropic: Well, considering the fact that it’s after midnight, I will probably be heading to bed.

BigDong88: we should get naughty I can come to you

MissAnthropic: Um … or we could not.

BigDong88: y not. You are preety hot

MissAnthropic: So being relatively attractive is an automatic indicator that I am interested in dropping everything to have an internet dude come to my house for random sex?

BigDong88: Im packin down below.

MissAnthropic: Your handle implies that. I really think I will pass. As tempting as it sounds, no thank you. Besides, I’m about 10 years older than you, but I’m sure if you contact enough girls on here, you’ll find at least one desperate one.

BigDong88: I like older girls

BigDong88: more mature smart and sexual

MissAnthropic: I agree, but I’m still not interested.

BigDong88: your making my day

MissAnthropic: How so? By denying you?

BigDong88: cuz ur sexy and a cougar

MissAnthropic: I think you have to be over 40 to be a cougar. I’m pretty sure I would be considered a Puma.

BigDong88: well whtaver

BigDong88: ur still a little older than me

BigDong88: and thats hot

BigDong88: ya thats perfect

BigDong88: do u have roommates

BigDong88: I want to cum over and see you

MissAnthropic: No.

BigDong88: I jerking off on my pillo

MissAnthropic: And from the sound of it, that’s about all the action you will ever get. Have fun sleeping in your shame.

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