I have heard about and experienced firsthand the nightmare that is internet dating. It seems the internet is a breeding ground for perverts, douche bags, and mental pygmies. I would be remiss if I did not share these experiences with all of you Comedivas. Yes, these are real conversations.
A Star is Born!
TimidTool: Is it still too early in the day to hit on a woman?
MissAnthropic: I don’t know. Is it too early for me to be drinking whiskey?
TimidTool: It might be. what brings ya to an online dating site?
MissAnthropic: I like to meet emotionally crippled men with weird sexual fetishes.
TimidTool: nice, hahaha
MissAnthropic: So, what’s wrong with you? Let’s get that out of the way right off the bat.
TimidTool: hmmm well i can be quite down on myself
MissAnthropic: Okay, low self-esteem. What else?
TimidTool: i am a great guy overall
MissAnthropic: That is what they all say.
TimidTool: oh really. Well I really am. Other than that I think io pretty go peson.
MissAnthropic: um..was that English?
TimidTool: yeah my grammer sucks, so sue me =P
MissAnthropic: That was more than just grammar.
TimidTool: I see, I am not saying my grammer is that bad. Do you prefer it if I type good grammer as well?
MissAnthropic: Yeah and spelling would be helpful too. “Grammar”
TimidTool: OkI am not saying I’m a dumbass
TimidTool: I will be honest. I’m a nice guy who needs to be more confident and realize he has more going for him then he realizes.
MissAnthropic: Like what?
TimidTool: Well I have a really big dick. I have never measured but have heard that I should be in movies.
MissAnthropic: Well, there goes your nice guy image. Ugh.
TimidTool: I am a nice guy and have a kot going for me. I also have a big dick do you nwant to see a picture?
MissAnthropic: I will pass on that, thanks. Good luck with your career in porn.
TimidTool: Don’t go.
TimidTool: Did you go?
TimidTool: Where shjould I send the picture?
TimidTool: Come back hello