Swagic: Geeky Dance Grooves

For those of the geeky of heart, social situations wherein dancing is the focal point can seem daunting.

But why should the smooth groovin’, happy footed Mike Changs and Beyoncés get all the fun?

Who’s to say geeks don’t know how to party? …At least, who’s to say we don’t know how to party when we’re around other geeks or we awesomely own our geekitude even in the presence of queen bees?

So today I bring you moves every geek [who hasn’t the coordination to master the Dougie] should be proud to flaunt at every soirée!

The Swish & Flick

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Just like Hermione’s movie wand-work [but on beat, kind of, if you can manage]! It’s all in the wrist, really, so don’t go too crazy: any sudden and over-exaggerated motions of the entire arm will probably cast a black-eye on your partner/anyone within a 3 ft. vicinity. For additional suaveness, place your non-wand hand on your waist in a sassy way, while grinding on your partner! It’s the Levitation Spell, friend, so it’s supposed to get something up.

The Wibbly-Wobbly

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The time-space issue the Doctor’s often asked about is super confusing. It’s just a mass of timey-wimey, wibbly-wobbliness he can’t quite put into actual words. So what better way to really capture the essence of this than by randomly disappearing behind your partner and then ‘magically’ reappearing again in one giant leap? This works better if both partners are facing the same direction, and awkwardly gyrating to the same tempo.

The Hodor

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What’s Hodor known for, apart from saying his own name? Happily saying his name and then excitedly running off! So do the same, running just a few feet in both directions. Be warned: in the presence of another geek, your adorkability rating will skyrocket, especially if you return with a drink for them. It’s also a decent excuse to get off the dancefloor.

The Elevenses Jig

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Nothing makes geeks happier than the prospect of shameless, endless eating. So, really, just follow your heart/stomach. Let your body express itself in the most natural way it knows how. While throwing in some pseudo-high kicks.

The Star Two-Trek

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Really just the basic two-step plus some sexy live long and prosper saluting, this one’s all about the swagga. Channel Picard to the best of your abilities and let your face’s sternness do the rest. Chances are, other trekkies will be privy to your inner-Picard, so expect some major swooning. Moreover, if done correctly, let hands do what legs do: and scissor ’em with your partner’s! 

Groovin’ by Luis M. Navarro and Vickie Toro.

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About the author

Hi, friend! I'm Vickie Toro. I'm the lesbian in Lesbros, the creator and one of the writers of BAMF Girls Club, and the Frumpy Girl who commiserates with your Style Ineptness. I'm a Potterhead, water-dancer, and overall TV junky. Also sports movies make me cry.

View all articles by Vickie Toro

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