Hollywood Lied to Me: 5 Movie Tropes That Never Happen in Real Life

4)  Bad People Getting Hit By Buses:

Regina George in brace - Hollywood Lies

Right now, I can think of 5 movie characters I know that were hit by a bus (#ReginaGeorge), and I can think of zero real life people I know that were.  Are the bus drivers just way more careful in my neighborhood?  All I know is Hollywood promised me more justified vehicular homicide than I’m actually getting.

5)  Making Love on the Beach:

burt lancaster & deborah kerr - from here to eternity 1953 - Hollywood Lies

This happens in those ridiculously romantic movies that I kind of want my life to be like, but I have yet to find myself getting busy by the ocean. I mean, it can’t be just me, right…oh, it is just me? Fair enough.

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Oh, you Hollywood fiend, you.  Here’re 4 actresses who could totally reboot superhero franchises!


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About the author

Hi, I’m Gina Scott! I am a North Carolina native, but have recently been transplanted to Los Angeles to intern for the amazing Comediva. I still have all of my Spice Girl dolls in their boxes and Geri’s leaving will always be a sensitive subject. I love French fries and Tom Cruise but not necessarily in that order, and I base all my relationships in life on the other person’s knowledge of FRIENDS episodes. Follow me on the twitter dot com: @the_apologetic (disclaimer: this is my second twitter account. The first was deactivated promptly after the Backstreet Boys followed me because, really, where was I going to go from there?)

Read more from me at: isthisthereallifeee.tumblr.com

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4 comments

  1. Kumori Myu-Jishan

    I’ve gathered that this text has intentional comedic undertones, but nevertheless/everthemore:

    1. An elementary school classmate of mine looked absolutely stunning without her glasses and with her hair not in a ponytail. Score one for the movies.

    2. You do realize the actual purpose of training montages? That the training actually does take time, and that this is just a way of not making an audience watch a month-long movie? If not, I suggest DVDA’s song cleverly titled “Montage”.

    3. I’ve actually initiated at least three spontaneous dance sequences myself. At my college. Heh, shows how sane I am, but ah well.

    4. As far as buses go I don’t know, but I have seen bad people get their up-and-comings on the road: a drunkard hooligan kid crashing his bike and smearing himself on the pavement (he lived), a reckless driver ramming his car under a trolleybus (he lived), etc/

    5. Meh, I’ll give you the sex on the beach thing, but only because I rarely ever go seaside for holidays anymore. And, to quote Anakin Skywalker whilst groaning internally for doing so, “I don’t like sand. It’s coarse and rough and irritating…and it gets everywhere”.

    Now that I’ve officially killed the buzz, off I go.

  2. Comediva

    Are you a professional troll? I hope not, since you’ve never seen a typo before. But thanks, we fixed it! Kisses!

  3. JWCamp

    Are you a professional writer? I hope not since you don’t know the difference in “apart” and “a part.”

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