What’s your favorite cupcake flavor?
Either sunkissed human female or red velvet. I’d eat both…but I’m on a diet. Gotta watch my figure for the reboot, you know.
What or whom inspired you to pursue a career in comedy?
My old pal Roy Scheider and I used to watch Whose Line Is It Anyway? almost every day after we wrapped. I’d be in my tank; he’d be on the couch in his trailer, and we’d both laugh at pretty much anything Colin Mochrie said. It really inspired me to hone my comedy cartilage.
If Chuck Norris were to corner you in an alley and challenge you to a duel, what would be your weapon of choice?
4. What are some challenges you’ve faced since going down the comedy track and what, in your experience, has made those obstacles worth overcoming?
It’s really tough breaking out of the horror box, you know? People see me as this big menacing great white kinda guy, and it’s hard to get them to look past that.
What’s the funniest thing you’ve ever heard/seen?
That episode of Pinky and the Brain when Brain becomes a country singer.
What’s your favorite comedy movie or T.V. show of all time?
Not comedy per se, but does SeaQuest DSV count? Man, I really miss Roy. I wish I had time to tell him how I felt. How I really felt about him. Hated that dolphin though. HATED him. Did you know I auditioned for the role of Darwin? Got turned down because I couldn’t “emote with squeaky zeal.” Direct quote. Great show, though … otherwise.
Which comedienne, dead or alive, would you love to work with/meet?
I’d love to be in the middle of a Tracy Ullman-Colin Mochrie comedy sandwich!
When you’re not writing/performing comedy, you’re…
Munching on tourists, undersea gardening; Also, I’ve just gotten into basket-weaving!
The title of your autobiography?
And now an excerpt from that biography:
Bruce Fintale, better known as Jaws in the 1975 horror/film of the same name, is a great white shark from Martha’s Vineyard, Massachusetts. He grew up with twenty brothers and sisters, which explains his embarrassing emo phase. Jaws still holds a world record in number of tourists eaten in a single summer. He is currently working on his memoirs. He is also very, very hungry.