Comediva Pick: Breaking Up In Ikea

Ikea is one of the most magical places on earth. They take their store so seriously it could be a painstakingly detailed Stanley Kubrick set. Seriously, next time you’re in one of these megaliths, take a look inside the closets, drawers, and cabinets. They’re so fully stocked with outdated 90s clothes, shoes, and weirdly trendy dishware that you could actually live in one of these stores for weeks and have everything you need. And that includes food! I mean, their meatballs are famous! It’s evident that someone has a good marketing team when you think of swedish meatballs, your immediate association is a furniture superstore.And Ikea is the mecca of the impulse buy. Sure, you may have gone to Ikea with the strictest intentions of picking up a two-person loveseat and a side table for your living room, but good luck leaving without a whole new set of silverware, a ficus, and a full nursery set for the child you haven’t even began to think of conceiving yet. It’s no use trying to resist them. They have knickknacks galore.

This video truly captures the heart of Ikea — a place which leaves no possible stone unturned. If you’re serious enough, or deluded enough, to go to Ikea with your significant other, you better be prepared for a world of arguing over things that would never have mattered to you in real life. He wants an oblong coffee table and but you know that a rectangle will go better with the room, and soon World War III is breaking out and you’re accusing him of sleeping with your sister because she’s ALWAYS LOVED OVALS.

Ikea really is a place of wonder, where dreams can be made or broken with one out of stock Liatorp. But it’s also a place where you learn that sometimes you either have to settle — whether it’s for the black Karlstad instead of the white, or the significant other who doesn’t at all respect your choices in armoires — or just make a clean break and try again later. Maybe some other time you’ll return with the perfect boyfriend and you’ll both agree on an entertainment unit, and it’ll be in stock and easy to put together, and then you can watch TV and eat some hot swedish meatballs and glance out the window and see that now, pigs can fly.


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