Seeing as my 2nd generation iPod Touch is about as relevant as the Jonas Brothers, I’ll be directing my attention to some other Apple products coming out soon that can fill the void where friends should be.
Apple has finally teamed up with Crocs to form a match made in consumer heaven. Remember that annoying glitch with the iPhone where you keep bumping into various objects and children when texting while walking? Now with iCrocs, the shoes that sync with your iPhone, you’ll be able to see what’s happening in front of you right on your iPhone. Using the latest technology, iCrocs detects the space you’re about to walk into and places it right on your iPhone screen so you know when its time to stop, slow down, or go around that pesky obstacle.
When Google released Google Glass, Apple was quick to begin developing its own version of this totable gadget. Put on a pair of iGlasses and suddenly you’ll be able to see the world in Retina Display! With the Instagram iGlasses app, you can see the world with your favorite vintage filter or, with Vine, you can see everything in unending 6-second loops. Your move, Google.
When Apple came out with FaceTime in 2010, it became an immediate staple of video communication. However, making it so easy to video chat, soon became a problem, especially for those who prefer to exist permanently in pajamas. Therefore, Apple has announced: MaceTime, the best way to keep those pesky video callers away when all you want to do is sit back and relax in your own filth. What starts out as an innocent request to video chat soon turns into a violent mess of pepper spray. Looks like someone should’ve invested in a pair of iGlasses.
Sometimes, you get hungry. There’s an Apple product for that. Well, kinda. Just tell Siri you’re hungry and out pops a Macintosh Apple. And, for some reason, someone has already taken a bite out of it.
Choking hazard.
