What’s a Potter-loving nerd to do when she encounters a malevolent muggle or wand-wielding wizard who doesn’t appreciate geekery? Insult them, of course!
We’ve compiled a list of 15 killer comebacks — chock-full of Harry Potter lexicon — that will destroy those despicable Dursleys and merciless Malfoys. Accio Harry Potter Insults!
1. I wish Protego could shield me from your ugliness.
2. Here’s some floo powder, be sure to speak unintelligibly.
Oooooh, burn!
3. You keep talking, but all I hear is Moaning Myrtle.
4. I’d like to turn all your belongings into Portkeys.
5. You’re about as smart as Dudley is skinny.
6. I’d say that I like you, but I shall not tell lies.
7. Leave before I do something that allows me to see a Thestral.
8. You suck the life out of a party like a Dementor sucks the soul out of a mouth.
9. Let’s make an Unbreakable Vow that you never come near me.
10. Whenever someone says something nice about you, my Sneakoscope starts whistling.
11. If Voldemort were still around, I’d tell him you were the Chosen One.
12. You’re the reason Mandrakes cry.
13. Here’s some Polyjuice Potion. Go turn into someone else.
14. Unless the Prophecy says you’re going to walk away right now, I don’t want to hear it.
15. Snape sent an owl. He wants his greasy hair back.
Pardon me? 50 points from Gryffindor!
