11 Things We Hope Curiosity Finds on Mars

While we hope the Curiosity rover discovers many secrets about our universe, we’d also kind of like it to beam us back some cheap tacos from the ’90s.

And, if you’re listening, Curiosity, can you also keep a lookout for the following things..? 


Photo: NASA. Pretty dang adorable, right?

A script for the Veronica Mars movie. Come on. Her last name is “Mars.”


The meaning of life artistically etched on a big ol’ rock. It’d better be deep. 

New iMacs. Finally.

One case of Crystal Pepsi to confirm that the clear cola wars were a goverment conspiracy.


Space Jesus and the Flying Spaghetti Monster having tea and eating Little Debbie sandwich cakes together because that will give us hope.

The TARDIS so Bobak can be Doctor Who’s new companion like he was destined to be.

Patty Mayonnaise from Nickelodeon’s Doug because their love was out of this world. 
A whole mess of Tribbles because we like to believe that art imitates life.

Teenaged martians playing with pogs. Even Martains have stupid fads. Thank goodness. Now we feel less silly.

An 8th Harry Potter Book, a 9th movie, and an actual alien race of wizards.

The 79, 89, 99 cent Taco Bell menu because those were better times.



For more Mars fun, check out Bobak Pick-Up Lines!



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About the author

Kristen Bobst is a grade-A comedy writer, an unstoppable sock puppeteer, and the world’s foremost whimsy aficionado. She certainly believes the meaning of life really is 42; and right now Kristen is really into The Carrie Diaries.

Comediva. Where the funny girls are.

View all articles by Kristen Bobst

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